I’m just here, so depressed and mad at the world right now especially at the unfairness of it all. Whenever I get like this, its either I throw a massive tantrum and if that doesn’t work which by the way it’s totally not working right now, I either look for a pen and paper and scribble furiously on it, writing to my heart’s content or bake but right now I feel like writing it down. I mean you would be wondering what all this ranting and rambling is all about or wondering about what new psycho is on the block now…………. You will know in a minute!
Hurrrrgh…..the pain of long distance relationship, I don’t think there is enough words to describe it, to describe being apart from your other half, to describe the pain of seeing other couples so happy and you wishing you could have something like that, the pain of wondering when your child is going to finally get to meet his father, the father that has never held his own son!, yep that’s the kind of pain and though words cannot describe it but I will try. It’s like when a hot poker is being stuck down one’s throat or asked to walk on shards of glass and I don’t even think that can adequately describe the pain especially when you are head over heels in love with that person, it’s horrible!. Kudos to strong men and women out there who think their partners are worth waiting for especially the ones raising their kids alone or in some cases have never held their own kids only seeing them via skype/facetime/pictures, I mean no one absolutely wants their kids thinking they live in the computers or ipads, that is just a horrible way of living and I don’t blame anyone who decides they can’t do it anymore, I mean it’s hard, harder than hard because you will always feel like part of you is missing and don’t even get me started on all other things that could go wrong………….
I will always keep the candle burning for you my love and till we see again(I don’t know when)this is dedicated to you and our child(12 years together and still counting).